What it is to Burn
by NY BrAt 007
Summary: One of the most feared superstars spends his time watching one of the WWE's premier divas. quick little song fic


_Author's top note:  I really need to stop writing these stories, one-shot, at 2 in the morning when my pain medication is just starting to kick in.  I've never ever written anything like this, I don't know how it's supposed to sound or turn out, but I think it was just a story I needed to get out of my system before I could write more on my other stories.  _

_BTW:  The band Finch owns all © to the song "What it is to Burn"._

_Special thanks:  This story is dedicated to one of my best friends on here, the marvelous Funky In Fishnet, Emily.  I became inspired after reading her Molly/Raven stories (all of which I recommend) but I'm not sure where this couple came from.  It's certainly not normal…_

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She didn't know he watched her every chance he got, between every promo and every match, every fan opportunity and the public appearances.  He didn't know why he was so drawn to her, she was the complete opposite of everything he's ever stood for and fought against.  She was too caught up in her fake plastic blonde Barbie world, faking everyone with the strong persona she held once the cameras started rolling.

But he knew different.

_Today's on fire_

_The sky is bleeding above me, and I am blistered _

_I walk these lines of blasphemy, every day_

_And still…___

He saw her when she didn't think anyone was watching.  He saw the hurt in her eyes as she stood in front of the mirror and scrutinized herself, comparing every inch of her body to those of the few stick-thin divas the WWE had hired.  He watched as she held up her hair for her reflection in the mirror and let it drop back down to her shoulders with a look of disgust on her face.

Every day, as soon as she got to the arena for the night she'd go into her room, take out the scale she packed safe away in her suitcase, and either look happy or depressed.  And that all depended on what the scale told her.

He thought she was beautiful.  But it didn't matter because his opinion was the least that mattered to her.

_Like a bad star, I'm falling faster down to her _

_She's the only one who knows, what it is to burn_

He'd never cared for anyone like he cared for her.  Women would come and go, stuck with him as the writers saw fit, but they meant nothing.  They used him for protection against some of the losers backstage and he heard when they would be giggling with their friends, wondering aloud how he could be so stupid as to believe that they cared.

It was all the same to him, because none of them compared to her.__

_I feel diseased _

_Is there no sympathy, from the sun_

_The sky's still fire_

_But I am safe in here, from the world outside_

And as he watched her, he noticed a strange transformation taking place—one that both fascinated and worried him.  Day after day she would become increasingly later to the arena.  Her hair was looking more and more unkempt and her roots were beginning to grow out, the brown hair a striking contrast to the happy platinum blonde she'd been accustomed to over the years.

He also noticed another thing that would seem like nothing to someone else, but he'd been there and he knew what to look for.

She began to wear shirts with long-sleeves and on the occasion she wore a short-sleeved shirt to the ring, he saw the bandages that were taped on the inside of her wrist before she hurriedly pulled on her elbow and wrist bands

She had become a cutter.  And her once tan, toned, and beautiful arms became pale with the angry red cuts slashed across her wrists.  She didn't think anybody saw and believed she was doing a good enough job in hiding them.

He knew and he saw. 

_So tell me _

_What's the price to pay for glory_

And although it sounded a bit sick and twisted, he felt close to her because of the experiences the two shared.  He would watch silently as she came back from her matches, breathing hard and on the brink of tears because, despite her hard work, she still wasn't where she wanted to be.  She wasn't on top yet.

Every evening, like clockwork, she would brush her hair back from her face, grab a towel and her shower kit from her bag and head to showers.  He watched as the doors closed, but didn't become frustrated.  He wasn't some perverted guy who hid cameras in the shower.  He just liked to watch her.  And it wasn't until a few weeks into her downward spiral did he begin to notice something horrific.

A few minutes into her shower, he looked down at the floor beneath the stall and saw the water begin to turn red.  And every time he was frightened for her safety before she would shut the water off, throw a towel around her body and step out of the shower, a washcloth wound tight around her wrist.

The last thing he wanted to do was see her acting this unhappy and miserable.

_Like a bad star, I'm falling faster down to her _

_She's the only one who knows, what it is to burn_

He wasn't the only one who had begun to notice her unusual behavior.  In a matter of two weeks she'd been approached by the entire diva roster, Vince, Linda, Evolution (who never paid anyone the time of day), and a slew of other wrestlers most would deem unapproachable.  And during every encounter, she would cross her arms over her chest (pressing her wrists against her ribcage to stop the dull pain), smile, and assure them that everything was fine and they should stop worrying about her.

But he never approached her, so she never got the chance to lie to him like she did to all the others.  But there would be a difference between him and everyone else, she wouldn't lie to him; that was just something he knew from watching her all this time.  He could tell if she really cared for someone and trusted them, she would give 100% of herself and in the process, tell him everything.

He longed to be that pillar of strength for her.

_Today is fire, and she burns _

_Today is fire, and she burns_

_SHE BURNS, SHE BURNS, SHE BURNS!!!_

She had just walked into the arena; he was watching her from his stationary place around the corner.  She swung her bag over her shoulder tiredly and then did something she'd never done before, no matter how many times they'd been in the ring or on screen together—she turned her head, her now lifeless hair swinging dully over her shoulders, and she looked right at him.

He turned around to make sure there wasn't someone behind him and when he saw no one, faced her once more.  She was still looking at him, unmoving and not saying a word.

Then in one move she dropped her bags and walked over to where he was standing until she was right in front of him and now it was his turn to just stand there and not say a word.

"How long have you been watching me?"  She asked quietly, staring at the ground instead of making eye contact with him.

He avoided her gaze as well, and instead of talking, allowed the silence to answer for him.

"I'm not freaked out or anything."  She assured him.  "I've always felt connected to you in a way, I could just never tell how or why.  But I think I know now.  We both have all these deep dark secrets we want to keep to ourselves, but can't help wanting to share with someone else—someone we know feels the same way and wouldn't act judgmental or get creeped out."

"But we're two entirely different people—"

"We're not all that different Kane."  She interrupted quietly, pulling up the sleeve of her dark red shirt.  She took his hand and faced his palm up and held her wrist next to his.  The same red lines that were fading from his wrist were now on hers.  "I trust you and I think that we can help each other."

"I would dream about you saying those words to me but never in a million years could I fathom them actually coming from your mouth Trish Stratus."  He confessed.

She looked up and gave him a small smile, a mere fraction of how happy she used to be, but it was a start. 

_Like a bad star, I'm falling faster down to her _

_She's the only one who knows, what it is to burn_

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_Author's bottom note:  So what'd you all think of the Trish/Kane pairing?  They were definitely an unconventional choice of couple, but I like it and for some strange reason, I can see it *shrugs*   So do you think I should do some sort of continuation or leave it one-shot like this?  Cuz really, it could go either way, I just wanna know what your opinions are. _

_Your reviews make my world go round.  And you don't want to be the one responsible for making  my world stop… lol.___


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